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Am I in love? Here’s how to know if you’re in love with someone

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If you ask anyone if love is complicated, they’ll respond “yes,” or at the very least, “sometimes.” Part of the complexity of love stems from the reality that it can be challenging to feel the same way as the person you love—or when they do, yet your relationship fails to take off.

It might be effortless for certain people to find love. But not everyone feels love in the same way. For others, you may need more counseling to assist you in identifying your feelings. Love can also complicate life since it comes in various forms and you may not understand whatever type of love you are experiencing.

When you start falling hard for someone, the feelings can become very intense, and there is an excitement that is difficult to articulate. It honestly feels a lot like falling in love for the first time. So, it can be hard to tell the difference between romantic love, platonic love, liking, and even being obsessed with someone. Things are more straightforward when it comes to non-sexual love. Wikipedia defines platonic love as “a sort of love that is not sexual or romantic.” This type of love means you can have meaningful platonic relationships with friends, relatives, and anyone else.

Platonic relationships allow you to relax and create trust in a safe and supportive setting. You can bond via shared interests and hobbies and provide and receive emotional and mental support as needed. It may not be easy to figure out what your feelings mean and what kind of love you are feeling, but we are here to help. When determining romantic love, things might get a little more complicated, although it’s not necessarily tricky. Several apparent signals will tell you when your feelings are genuine, and you may finally be in love.

Continue reading to discover how to distinguish these similar, yet still distinct, experiences.

What does it mean to fall in love?

Maybe you fall in love with someone you just met, but you soon discover that the first blush of love has clouded your judgment. When the initial intensity wears off, your sentiments begin to wither without taking root.

You can also fall in love without feeling euphoric or heart-pounding excitement. If a person falls in love with their best friend, for example, they may find that their long-time friendship suddenly turns romantic and sexual almost overnight. Of course, even if there is no romantic or sexual desire, your love for friends, or friendship love, can be rather intense. Love does not always take the same form. It sometimes goes through distinct stages.

When you first fall in love with someone, you feel like you’re infatuated with them. You’re both excited and scared. And what if it’s mutual? Many people experience euphoric ecstasy, which can keep you and your companion entirely engrossed in each other. That just-fell-in-love emotion frequently evolves into something less charged but more stable and permanent.

The intensity of these early sentiments drives higher-than-normal amounts of chemicals such as dopamine. With the help of oxytocin, a hormone that plays a role in attachment, these rushing impulses frequently settle into a deeper connection.

So, are you in love? Here’s how to tell if you’re falling in love with someone.

You feel safe with them

In general, trust is an essential component of love. If you’ve been hurt or lost in a relationship before, you may place a high value on this feeling of emotional safety.

When you view them, you may feel that your tension lowers, much like when you get home after a long day. It is natural to want to shield yourself from pain. When you feel safe enough with someone to tell them about your flaws or mistakes, this is often a sign of love.

You’re encouraged to show affection

Trust is an essential component of love in general. You may value this sense of emotional protection if you’ve already been through romantic tragedy or sorrow. When you look at them, you may experience a release of tension, similar to when you arrive home after a long day.

It is natural to want to protect yourself from pain. The development of love is typically indicated by feeling safe enough with somebody to trust them about your defects or failings.

They complement you

You are probably not looking for someone to “complete” you if you have a good sense of self-love, self-esteem, and self-compassion. Instead, you require someone who will compliment you.

You’ll know you love someone when you enjoy spending time with them and caring for them instead of enjoying someone only because they make you feel better about yourself.

You constantly think of them

When you’re in love, your lover is constantly in your thoughts. You might suddenly need to call them because you haven’t spoken to them in a few hours. Or perhaps you go into a clothing store intending to buy something for yourself but end up purchasing something for your partner.

When you’re in love, this individual is always in your thoughts, but it’s not overwhelming; instead, thinking about them sounds comfortable.

You get a bit jealous

Jealousy is a normal human emotion, and in general, what you do with envy is what matters. It never hurts to talk about your feelings, but you might want to forego digital eavesdropping and social media snooping.

When you love someone, you become intrigued by the other people with whom they spend their time and wonder about their relationship. You may also worry about potential risks to your love, such as an attractive coworker or an old lover. In general, these concerns tend to decrease as trust grows.

You want it to be physical

Because this could be a symptom of lust, make sure you’re experiencing it alongside all the other indicators of being in love to ensure it’s more than just sexual attraction.

“You crave their touch, fragrance, taste, or everything you can get,” Khalili explains. You want to feel connected to the person you love, and this is one method to achieve that.

According to researchers, love as a whole evolved from the primary bodily drive to reproduce. But people have been able to tell the difference between lust and love because research has shown that each affects different parts of the brain.

You feel excited

When you’re in love, you’re delighted to do things you’ve done a million times before because you’re doing them with your spouse for the first time. They’re the first ones that come to mind when you see a romantic movie trailer or decide to make a short trip to the nearest fast-food restaurant.

You’d even sit through four hours of a sporting event if it meant spending time with them when you’re in love; the foundation of your perception shifts. It is comparable to the sensation of being fully awake and eager. You’ve discovered someone who makes everything new and exciting, even if it’s just sitting on a couch watching Netflix.

You subconsciously plan your future

You may fantasize about future dates, adventures, trips, marriage, or establishing a family with the person you like. It may not be easy to imagine life without them in the future.

Whatever it is, it demonstrates that you are enthusiastic about this person and feel safe enough to include them in your plans.

You feel empathy

When you’re in love, you begin to consider your lover part of yourself, so when they’re sad, worried, or ecstatic about anything, such as winning a competition or buying something they desire, you feel the same way.

While you empathize with your spouse, you want to make small sacrifices for them, such as going to the supermarket for soup and medicine when they’re sick. Small gestures like that are simple to carry out for someone you like.

You put an effort into the relationship

Relationships aren’t accessible; they require active participation from both partners to survive. One sign that you love someone is if you are entirely willing to put in the effort over a lengthy period.

More significantly, each individual in the partnership appreciates the opportunity to contribute. And this goes back to the idea that love, from a biological standpoint, is founded on reward areas of the brain that produce feel-good chemicals like dopamine and oxytocin.

You become a better person

When being around your significant other inspires you to better yourself in some manner, whether by creating new goals or adopting a more optimistic attitude, you know you’re in love.

Your partner should encourage you to improve, but not in a constant negative manner. If a spouse isn’t building you up, you should consider looking elsewhere for love—regardless of what other qualities they have that you adore. When you’re genuinely in love with someone, you want them to succeed just as much as you do, because you want a secure future.

Conclusion

If you want to know if you love someone romantically, look for signs like wanting to take care of your partner, wanting to show affection, and being willing to put in the work. Everyone feels love differently, but these indications are solid markers that you and your spouse are on the right track.

Even though falling in love is a beautiful thing, you should be careful and watch out for warning signs to make sure your relationship is healthy.

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